Yellowstone Season 5 Premiere Recap: Tragedy Strikes as John Takes Office (2024)

‘After Your Speech, I’m Pouring You a Double’

As “One Hundred Years Is Nothing” began, John’s worst nightmare came to pass: He was elected governor of Montana. When opponent Scott McMullen called to concede defeat, asking that John fight for the whole state moving forward, the Dutton family’s patriarch reminded him — and us (as if we could forget) — that “I fight for what’s right. I don’t really care who supports it.” As if to underscore that point, or perhaps to bold and italicize it, in his first remarks as governor, he declared that no more would Montana be treated like the “rich man’s plaything.” Knowing full well that Market Equities’ development plans were down the s–tter, Caroline called in Sarah Atwood (Dawn Olivieri). “We’re taking the gloves off,” the bigwig told Ellis. A bit late for that, no?

‘You Need to Find Somebody New to Fight’

Unaware that Sarah was on her way, Beth responded to a dream that reminded her of what a total d—k she’d been to Rip as kids by apologizing to him in the present. “I was f—king awful to you… ” she acknowledged. (And based on that series of flashbacks, that was putting it mildly!) “If it is any consolation, I was worse on myself.” Naturally, Rip didn’t need consolation. He knew full well that her heart was secretly as big as her brain. She just needed a new nemesis. In the meantime — in other words, until Sarah hit the scene — “You need to let yourself be happy,” Rip told his missus. “That’s the goal for you today.” And though vodka did the trick, maybe she could find something besides that that put a spring in her step.

‘Can You Believe This F—king S—tshow?’

As a bash to end all bashes was set up at the ranch to celebrate John’s “victory,” Lynelle warned that he had no allies in his new role… except for her. “I’m pretty easy to bribe,” he said, turning on the charm. “I’m well aware,” the new senator replied. “Every time I want a bill pushed through, I’m gonna find myself in a coat closet.” Ha — that would be a hoot. But John’s predecessor was as smart as she was funny. She reminded John that because he didn’t give a damn about getting reelected, he didn’t have to compromise — ever. For starters, he could cancel funding for Paradise Valley, thus screwing not only Market Equities but Rainwater. “It’s slave rules for you now,” Angela hissed at Thomas during John’s swearing-in ceremony, “and it’s all your fault.”

‘It’s Time for Your Pound of Flesh’

When Jamie balked to Beth that John’s plans would set the state back 30 years, she laughed that the goal was to set it back 100 — and he was going to help. On the ride back to the ranch, John went so far as to blame his adopted son for the situation in which he had put himself. Damn right Jamie could’ve won the office. But then what? Now he would have to sacrifice his ambition and self-loathing, and just do what he was told for the next four years. And make no mistake — John didn’t give two craps about the state. Well, maybe one crap. “I love Montana, but I’m doing this for our ranch… ” he admitted. “The ranch comes first.”

‘This Looks Exactly Like What It Is — Work’

At the party cheering John’s “win,” he marveled at how much it resembled a wedding reception. Which was kinda fitting, as “you are married to Montana, for better or worse,” Lynelle pointed out. Shortly after Beth made the acquaintance of a singer named Abby (Lainey Wilson), who wouldn’t date a cowboy who could never love her more than chaps and riding and all, Ryan, of all people, “roped” her into a dance. (Who knew he had any game whatsoever?) While they were getting “acquainted,” Beth sought out Rip, who confessed that the soiree reminded him of the emperor Nero. John, Rip reckoned, was “gonna lose this place.” Did somebody order a buzzkill?

‘I Had a Brother —for an Hour, Anyway’

While Kayce was busy with Livestock Commission wrangling, Monica — it being months after Season 4’s finale and all — went into labor and tried to drive herself and Tate to the hospital in Billings. It did not go well. A pickup truck collided with a… was that a buffalo?!? Whatever it was, a terrible accident ensued, after which… aw, crap. Kayce’s family wasn’t about to expand anymore. As “The Sting of Wisdom” began, Tate was encouraging his dad to try again to give him a sibling, despite the toll that the loss had taken on his mom. Later, Monica informed Kayce that she wanted to bury their ill-fated son on the ranch, if John would let them. Was this what would be “the end of us”? Nope. “I have to choose the end of us,” Kayce said, “and I will never choose that.”

‘We Ain’t Got Time for What Else?’

At the ranch, Rip dispensed to Carter the kinda tough love that Cole Hauser warned TVLine was coming. “God didn’t add extra daylight to Tuesday,” Beth’s hubby huffed as the boy saddled up John’s horse to ride out and play cowboy with the ranch hands. Carter had damn near impressed his surrogate dad when he steered the horse into a badger hole, breaking its leg and prompting Rip to put it down. Eesh. Rough day. In other developments, Rip tasked Ryan and Colby with hunting the wolves that had been chowing down on the cattle. Only after they’d accomplished their mission did they realize that the wolves were wearing radio collars. The guys had killed animals from Yellowstone National Park on the [bleeping] governor’s ranch! Rip’s solution? Take the bodies back to the park and set the collars adrift in the river.

‘The Invasion Ends Today’

On John’s first day as governor, during breaks from making it plain that he was hating every second of it, he canned his corrupt chief of staff and hired Beth as his replacement. John then ignored Jamie’s warnings of a devastating lawsuit and pulled both the funding and permits for Market Equities’ development, a move that not only set back Caroline but Rainwater. “And we’re right back where we started,” Angela just happened to be around to whisper in his ear. Making the most of her adopted brother’s miserable status as her whipping boy, Beth ordered Jamie, who’d sold his ranch, to stay at the Dutton ranch on weekends. “Say yes, ma’am,” she instructed him, rubbing salt in the wound. “Yes, ma’am.” Ah, Beth, as cruel as she is magnificent!

‘If You’re Gonna Look, Then Be Man Enough to Stare’

Watching the press conference at which John, in essence, declared war on Market Equities, Sarah — who gave the first impression that she just might be Beth’s wicked equal — noted that Jamie did not look like a happy camper. As she plotted to target him as John’s weak link, did anyone not think that the shark was gonna eat him alive? Later, John horrified Beth by getting Market Equities’ petition to rezone their development denied by promising to put his ranch in a conservation easem*nt. If you do that, she said, aghast, “we have no moves… We could lose the whole thing.” Finally, in a flashback, Young John handled the contractor spraying pesticide that was killing his cattle by having the man KO’d and hosing down his house with the deadly but EPA-approved stuff.

So, your thoughts on the double-header? Drop ’em in a comment below.